There are many bad things about summer, like the heat meaning you have to make do with a t-shirt only, and realising you can't hide your beer gut anymore, or your hair get trashed and sweaty all the time. Vanity aside you have to put up with some many idiots it's almost disgusting. Stupid fat women who haven't realised they're not a size 8 anymore (in fact they're probs double that), stupid idiotic men with sleeveless t-shirts, cargo shorts and flip-flops, people wearing sunglasses indoors (something I'm guilty of, but fuck it, I look good), this idea that a barbeque is an acceptable way to cook food. Do you not realise the fan-assisted electric oven is a great boon to society? It was invented so we didn't have to cook over open fires anymore, avoiding buring the outside of meat to shit and leaving the middle raw. Barbeques are good sometimes, but is it worth the other 8 times you have one and end up with food poisoning? Really?
Going to a pub during summer sucks as well. You kind of fancy a drink outside, only to discover everyone else has had the same idea, and you've got nowhere to sit. Great. Plus here in Glasgow only a few pubs have any kind of outside drinking area, and they're usually shit. The one opposite me (the Primary) is always filled with retards. And thanks to the Strathclyde Police confusing scum like neds with normal members of society we're not even supposed to drink in the park... what a crock of shit. If you ask me, you should be allowed to drink in public so long as you either a) have a full-time job or b) are a full-time student... and maybe c) rich enough never to work again. A totally unworkable system, but at least it wouldn't put me, who wants to drink a beer or two in the sun, alongside the fucking 15-year-olds who get pissed on Buckfast in a kids playground and leave broken glass everywhere.
And that's another atrocious thing about summer, all these fucking kids are suddenly free and running around. You can't go to the cinema because a bunch of pubescent twats want to go see something, and you have to queue behind them for ages, until there's no point seeing your film as it's 90% of the way through. And I happen to like going record shopping when it's quiet, like a Wednesday afternoon, but that goes out the fucking window when there's kids crowding all the shops, trying to buy something which is very probably balls. Plus when they ask you to buy them a bottle of vodka at half 4 on a Thursday you know they're basically fucked for life. And they walk slow down pavements, and they shout too much...
Damn, I'm sounding like a grumpy old man... I mean I guess I do like summer, I just don't like the fact everyone else does as well, because anything fun you can think of doing, someone else will have thought of it first, and it'll be too crowded to have any fun by the time you get there.
Roll On Autumn